Wow! Landing in Orlando in the middle of a storm Saturday night, September 15 should have been the first indicator that this was going to be an explosive week! Staying at a DisneyWorld Hotel should have been the second indicator that this was an “otherworldly” experience. All of the big names of Appreciative Inquiry, Positive Psychology, and Strength Based leadership were at this conference. I was so happy to see the luminaries joining hands and brains to describe the interface among and between all of the positive processes .

Sunday Jackie Binkert and I presented a day-long workshop on Appreciative Coaching, a really experiential day for coaches and people who work with coaches. We laid out the theory behind our process (Appreciative Inquiry) and then had participants work in pairs on a real topic through the four D cycle (Discover, Dream, Design, Destiny). We got great evaluations and had a grand time with our 31 participants.

The following days were filled with new learnings and new relationships. I watched and listened to my former mentor Frank Barrett describe Destiny through jazz and his magical jazz piano. Marcus Buckingham described his new book and new Strengths team assessment. Marty Seligman waxed lyrical about the work of Barbara Frederickson and positive emotions. Peter Coughlan of IDEO took us through a brainstorming session about finding new designs to address global warming. Dr. Frederickson herself provided the final keynote with two Indian yogis. She talked about the lasting positive effects of loving kindness meditation on individual happiness.

In between the keynotes, we mortals shared information, connected over drinks and goodies, and learned from each other. I particularly enjoyed my new Brazilian friends, Maria, Eduardo and Renato and hope to see them in their home city of Sao Paulo soon.

I will be doing a similar workshop with over 100 coaches for General Motors in a week or so. If you’d like to know more about the workshop for your company or group, respond to me here and I’ll contact you.

There once was a time when others marveled at my organization skills. Since I have worked out of a home office, however, my space is hardly visitor friendly. Piles of stuff have formed a mote around my desk. I step over the mote in the morning, and it keeps people away from my desk when I’m not here. I guess this is an advantage, but it hardly qualifies as organization. I say that I know where everything important is, but increasingly this is not only not true but an excuse for the lack of organization, transparent even to me.

So I bought a book, Getting Things Done, by the guru of time and self-management, David Allen. I cleaned up the pile next to my bed this morning. I’ve made the surface of my desk mostly visible. I know this is just the tip of the iceberg because as Allen says, we have to understand and implement a whole system of organization before we actually get organized. I’ve only read the first three chapters and I feel like much more is possible.

He says that we have to organize our thinking before we can organize our actions, that we carry around all the stuff we have not organized into some formula for ultimate action and that it weighs us down psychically. I see a correlation with Appreciative Coaching here. If we do not organize our thinking around our strengths and our skills to think deeply about them, we will not be able to act in a purposeful way to achieve our greatest dreams. We won’t procrastinate so much as run around in circles accomplishing something but not necessarily what we want.

So, Allen suggests writing down all of the projects in our heads. These can be as simple as “finish Aunt Millie’s scarf,” to “write the proposal for my next book ” or “write the book.” I suggest writing down all of your strengths. These can be as simple as “makes a mean grilled hamburger” to “manages complex IT projects to completion on time and on budget.” Allen suggests that we then write our ultimate hope or plan for each project, such as “the book sells a million copies in the first six months.” I suggest you write down a really big goal or dream that uses the strengths you have now. Finally, Allen says to write down one action that you can do now or today that moves you toward the vision of your ultimate hope for each project. I suggest that you write down one way in which you can use your strength today to move you closer to the dream or vision you have for your future.

Over the last week or so I’ve been dipping into Mike Robbins’ Focus on the Good Stuff, and Robert Emmons’ Thanks! Robbins’ book is a more conversational version of our Appreciative Coaching: A Positive Process for Change, and Emmons’ focuses on one aspect of living positively, and that is living with a grateful attitude. Another fascinating book that came out recently is entitled, Change the Way You See Everything, by Kathryn Cramer and Hank Wasiak. This book really gives specific tools for what they call “asset-based” (as opposed to deficit based) thinking: weighing everything in our lives from a positive, hopeful and possibility laden perspective.

What strikes me about each of these books and their authors is that we have perhaps reached what Malcolm Gladwell calls the tipping point, that is the point at which we are aware of more resources for viewing life positively than we are of viewing problems and weaknesses. I hope this is true.

At the same time, I’m also worried (as I am a worrier) that the positive perspective will be translated as happy talk, that folks who are sad, diagnosed with serious illness, or devastated in some deep way, will see all this as excluding them. To these people I say that the newish focus on emphasizing the good in life in no way diminishes its challenges. Being gentle with oneself, acknowledging pain and challenge, finding a sympathetic person to talk to, and waiting (as time does diminish many wounds) are all legitimate tools on the way to having a more positive outlook. I had personally held in such a wound for too long. Recently a friend invited me to talk about that wound in a safe and empathetic conversation. Just speaking it out loud released so much blocked energy, that I’ve found ways to return to my normally optimistic and thankful perspective.

If you find yourself wishing “if only I COULD feel positively about this situation” remember that it may take time, empathy, and patience to access that formerly positive person in you.